Yolanda Foster is taking to her Bravo Blog this week to discuss her friendship with Lisa Vanderpump. Yolanda writes that when Lisa cancelled last minute for GiGi’s painting party it confirmed to her that Lisa is just a Hollywood friend. Yolanda reveals Lisa, who calls herself her good friend, only came to visit her once while she was sick. Yolanda says this does not make Lisa a bad person, but that she now places their relationship in a different compartment of her heart.
Yolanda writes, “I like to see your different responses. Obviously, I love all the positive — but I also understand the negative comments as I know you are just judging what you see (which is only 25 percent of the whole story as everything gets edited down to a 45-minute show.)
I might be wrong but tonight’s show feels like the calm before the storm. . .
Anyway, these past two years have really changed who I am as a person and my view on people, particularly friends.
As a nurturer, I have always lived my life running for others trying to make everyone happy, even if I often overlooked my own needs. I do it because it makes me happy and fulfilled. Unfortunately, it also created a certain expectation within me that I have now learned to be unreasonable.
Anyway, in our home we have a wall with paintings made by all our children, family members and close friends. For Gigi’s graduation, I recreated that on a much smaller scale to fit her NY apartment so that she will always be reminded of everyone that loves her at home — a beautiful and important sentiment for me to give my daughter.
I hosted the painting/lunch because I thought it would be an intimate and meaningful way to bond with both old and new friends in this group. When the invitation went out, Kyle immediately responded that she had a meeting with the rabbi for her daughter’s bat mitzvah. But besides that I prepared food, etc. for six thinking everyone else was going to be there. I never heard from Kim, but I was much more sensitive to Lisa canceling five minutes before she was supposed to be at my house. It was hurtful because she supposedly is the closest to Gigi and I out of everyone in this group. If she truly had a business meeting should have called me the night before. Being a last minute thought on her mind showed her insensitivity, not only to me as a friend, but also a sign of disrespect to everyone else’s time who did make the effort to keep the commitment that had been on the calendar for three weeks. Everyone in this group has equally full business schedules that needed to be cleared — and small children at home on top of that.
I often wondered in the past 18 months while I was sick at home why Lisa (who calls me her good friend) only came to visit me once — but on the other hand never seemed to miss a star-studded event going on in our life. This incident only again confirmed my longtime suspicion that Lisa is an extremely strategic player and just another Hollywood friend to me. This absolutely does NOT make her a bad person or any less fabulous but it just puts her in a different compartment in my heart. I really gave her the benefit of the doubt because I wanted to believe that she was the friend she says she was but like my line goes: “Don’t tell me you are my friend, act like one.”
When the chips are down, life forces you to take inventory and reevaluate the people in your life. Quite a painful process while in it, but after it all it has been a freeing experience because it will now allow me to spend my time wisely and not run myself ragged trying to be engaged in too many relationships. Rather now I can focus on my love, my family, and the core group of friends that share the real story of my life.
It’s those that are not only there to share the glamourous, good times but more importantly those who are willing to be there for the bad that I proudly call my true friends.
Anyhow tonight’s episode might just be about another lunch to some, but it reminds me of a important lesson that I learned on that beautiful day last June.
I am writing this blog as I sit on Gigi’s couch in her apartment in NY, looking at the gorgeous wall of little paintings that shine bright in her warm little place called home.”
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