Gretchen Rossi Explains Why She & Alexis Bellino Are No Longer Friends & Calls Alexis Out For Overusing The Word Bully!

GretchenRossi

Real Housewives of Orange County Star Gretchen Rossi feels like she has a lot of things to clear up after this week’s episode, and she’s taking to her Bravo Blog to do it! Gretchen calls out Alexis on her hypocritical ways, and explains what caused the demise of their friendship. Gretchen says Alexis signed up for a Reality TV show and feels she does not have the right to label herself as a bully. After claims by Lydia McLaughlin that Gretchen was “cold” when they first met, Gretchen also talks about why she came across that way and a whole lot more!

Gretchen writes, “Wow, what an episode tonight! I’m not even sure where to start, so I’ll just dive in. I know Tamra was having a really hard time with having Alexis come to the party, and I think it was not cool of Vicki to even put Tamra in that position. I mean if she seriously was trying to work on their friendship and make amends then this isn’t the best first move towards resolve. Vicki knows that Alexis was threatening to sue Tamra and that they didn’t like each other, so why bring her to a very important night for Tamra?

I also find it funny that Alexis claims she is coming to support Tamra and her new business at Vicki’s house, but then when asked why she came by Tamra the real truth comes out and she claims she was there only to support Vicki. Which is it? Alexis shouldn’t have come at all unless she was there for the guest of honor and wanting to support her new venture. To me that’s inappropriate and shows she is self-serving.

The only reason I was telling Alexis to leave was because I was being protective over Tamra and her special night, and my past record shows I will always do that for my friends. I was protective over Alexis’ day and when it came to her dress luncheon a few years back as well. So when she started with the whole “we are bullies” accusations again I knew things were going to get ugly, so I said, “Why don’t you leave then if we are such bullies?” I mean if she thinks we are such bullies, then why walk back into it and stay?

She once again brings up the situation and and then cries victim, saying we are all beating up on her. You can’t just throw out all these ridiculous accusations and then expect us all to sit back and stay mum about it because now you want to pretend like this isn’t the time or place. She is right — this wasn’t the time and place and so maybe she should of called or texted each of us beforehand to say, “I know we have our differences but I am not coming to start a fight and I hope we can talk one on one later.” But, instead, she comes in claiming she was there only for Vicki (which of course I am going to have a beef with because I am friends with Tamra and saw the stress she was under by allowing her to come) and then says we are all being bullies again! We are not going to stand by and allow Alexis to use this night for her own agenda, no one would.

Obviously, as mentioned in previous episodes, I take a very strong stance on the usage of the word “bully.” I believe Alexis is attaching herself to a very serious issue that is the “catchphrase” right now hoping to have people feel sorry for her, and it is disgusting. This show is elective, bullying is not. Bottom line she willingly signed up for a show where she is more than aware that the premise is to have an opinion of what the other women are doing or how they act or conduct themselves. If you don’t like it then get off the show.

I think any Housewife that comes on and claims she is being bullied is defacing a very serious issue in the country. We have a responsibility by putting ourselves on these kinds of shows to not devalue serious issues that are happening in our community. Alexis is a grown woman, capable of making her own decisions, defending herself, and certainly in no way is her life being threatened or is in danger. I am not naive to think that bullying can effect adults and all types of people, and to see that it does not just have to be physical abuse — but this was not one of those scenarios. If it was then every single one of us woman could claim bullying at one time or another on this show. For goodness’ sakes, look at my first couple of seasons! I could have claimed that all day long, but I didn’t because I am stronger than that. I am a grown woman. I don’t like to play the victim card, and I signed up for this kind of scrutiny. Time to put your big girl pants on Alexis if you are going to play in this business. I mean is every single person that tweets you something negative a bully too?

As I brought up in this episode she lead the pack when it came to confronting Vicki in San Francisco, but of course when she lead the pack she claims that that kind of “ganging up” does not classify as bullying. However if you look at the facts they line up exactly to what she claims we did to her in Costa Rica. Vicki said “bring it on” in San Fran. Alexis said “let’s talk about the white elephant in the room.” Both initiated the conversations, which lead to the confrontation. Vicki felt like everyone was ganging up on her in San Fran and Alexis felt like everyone was ganging up on her in Costa Rica. Yet Alexis claims what we did was “bullying,” but when the shoe is on the other foot Alexis claims Vicki was not bullied. That’s hypocritical and contradictory. Alexis seems to think she can say whatever she wants about everyone else, but when someone says something she doesn’t like about her she threatens to sue or claims bullying. Honestly, it makes it difficult for some of us to want to engage with her.

I know I make mistakes and sometimes I do things that I look back on and feel bad about. (For instance, making comments about Vicki having work done this season.) However I have run that night in Costa Rica over and over again in my head, and I do not feel like what I said was anything close to bullying, or was done with ill intent or abusive in any way. I mean for goodness’ sakes, I had the least to say out of everyone. I even apologized to Alexis the next morning on the beach because she said I hurt her, which was the furthest thing from my intent. So I am not sure why she continues to categorize me in with the other woman as a “bully.”  She seems to have a very distorted understanding of the meaning of bullying and continues to solicit sympathy about something I never did to her. For this I lost total respect for her. From my perspective, the conversation was going in circles for close to two hours. I finally realized that maybe the only way to get it to shut down was to say to each party, this is how the other is seeing things. So I said “Alexis I know your heart, but these women don’t and sometimes the things you say can come off as pretentious.” I said it out of love, and out of wanting to help her understand why she was alienating herself from the group. How else was I supposed to honestly let her know as her friend that I know she doesn’t mean to do it, but she that was coming across a certain negative way to this group?

Some of you said I should have done it in private, but I had already, and she wasn’t hearing me. I even warned her on the plane ride over about the issues the girls were going to bring up to her and gave her examples from my point of view. Alexis seemsto have amnesia about this conversation on the plane, but this is part of the reason that our friendship continued to fall apart. You try to help your friend as much as possible, but when they keep thinking the worst about you and your intentions — and even claim you’re making things up or lying (like about Fox Five) that’s when I decided I don’t need to be friends with someone that thinks these things about me. It’s just like what Heather said, “Alexis seems to have a strange relationship with the truth.”  It broke my heart, but my friendship with Alexis just became too draining, unfortunately.

Also, lots of you have been tweeting asking me how I feel about the recent comments by newest Housewife Lydia, and so I would like to address some of those. Lots of you asked me why she said I was the coldest to her because that seemed so opposite of who I am; I remember thinking “I don’t remember not being nice to her or treating her poorly when we met.” However sometimes you don’t even realize that you might come across a certain way. But after seeing tonight’s episode I’m even more confused by her comments, because I felt like I was very nice to her when we meet. I even stood up and shook her hand with both of my hands and said “it was very nice to meet her.” So I’m not sure how that came off as cold. Unfortunately, when she was asking the other questions, it was awkward because everyone on her side of the couch was staring at me with evil eyes and judgment, so that is why I kept them short and sweet. I’m sad that it came off as being cold to her.

I was hoping to be able to have more one-on-one time with her after Tamra’s party to discuss these kinds of personal questions and be able to engage more with her, but unfortunately around that time is when things went way downhill for Grayson and I never got that time with Lydia. Since then, I explained to her that it wasn’t anything personal but that I had a lot of things on my plate that had to take priority. She seemed to completely understand, so I was disappointed she is still saying these things.

In her blog she said she doesn’t agree with Slade and my lifestyle, and I’m OK with that. This is the reason the world goes round because we all have different opinions and different ways of living life; however I thought being such a strict Christian she wouldn’t be so quick to judge. Lydia was married at 22 and has only known life with one man and one way of living. I have experienced more than some even do in a whole lifetime by age 31, so obviously my past experiences are going to help define the way I conduct my life and do things today.

Secondly what you missed was that I had just gotten back from New York. I had been with Slade and his son in the hospital for a week-and-a-half and been told that Grayson might not make it. Therefore I was beyond exhausted and honestly had no time for the BS of what was happening that night. It seemed so insignificant compared to what we were dealing with. It was a very difficult time for Slade and I, and it was heartbreaking to see Slade going through this with his child. (This is part of the reason you didn’t see a lot of me in these first few episodes and the next few episodes.) This also explains why I seem more removed and not really willing to deal with anyone’s bullhonky that night. I live authentically to who I am and what is going on in my life. I don’t change who I am in that moment because I think it will make me look better or whatever. The thing I hear the most when I am out and about is that I am so “real” on this show. It is my favorite compliment because even if you don’t agree with me or some things I do at least you know I am being true to myself, my beliefs, and don’t wavier on that.”

Photo Credit: Bravo

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28 Replies to “Gretchen Rossi Explains Why She & Alexis Bellino Are No Longer Friends & Calls Alexis Out For Overusing The Word Bully!”

  1. I understand the heartache Slade is going thru with a sick young son. I had a 10 yo son who was sick and in & out of hospital a lot. But Slade can’t be with his son all the time, and that must make the struggle, as a father, even more painful. THANK GOD Gretchen is standing beside him! Bless her for supporting the man she loves. And shame on ANYONE who gives either of them any grief or is just a plain ol’ pain the a*$. Both, Gretchen & Slade are in my prayers, but more importantly Grayson is. Prayer works people! It saved my sons life and will most certainly make a difference for this young man. Please pray for Grayson Smiley.

  2. Gretchen just stop. You are always trying to justify your poor behavior- rngaged to poor Jeff (cancer), Slade good guy? (yuck), New BFF Tamra umm YUCK, you were and are a bully and a poser. Just own it already. Many of us viewers don’t believe you…about anything. Bet those boxes in your condo were mostly empty. Your handbags are a cheap joke. You and Slade -shady to the fullest. You and Jeff, you were dating your “friend” on the side and Jeff was aware. You are a user and a mean girl. When will you reality losers ever get that just owning your poor choices and behavior is much more appealing than your fake crap. Oh, and what ever happened to the money from your first song that you supposedly donated to Jeff’s cancer fund and the cancer society people never saw a dime??? You suck.

    1. thanks u said it,pinky! one thing I can say is ” yes Vicki is annoying but she still has redeemable qualities like being an amazing mother to both her kids and even more loving grandmother, and a self made woman. everyone else on these reality how’s, like Brandi Granville, tamra, Gretchen Rossi, etc are famous for being infamous on bravo reality crap. the other question is why is Vicki soooo evil but not tamra, when Vicki’s daughter was diagnosed with possible cancer, divorce , then surprise Brianna is married etc when all this was going on where was tamra??? why wasn’t tamra there for Vicki just one time, I wld be there for a friend let alone a bet friend I called sister. that’s why I let things slide when it comes to Vicki because she has gone thru hell no one from the show was there for her. that’s evil. plus if u r dating slade u r not a good person he only cares about himself and his blonde show off he does not care for his dying little kid.

  3. It wasn’t any of her business she should have kept her mouth shut, he and the JokerPoker face Heather. They were like a back of wolves same as bully’s. I know Alexeis was making comments but the yelling and screaming was so low class.

    Oh! one more thing Gretchen sounded jelly about Slade going away to stay with his
    child. Who know’s maybe she had a big part in the entire problem between Slade and his X-wife and child.

  4. This is very poorly written and awkward blogging. It shows Gretchen’s lack of intelligence that she is unable to put simple sentences together accurately and properly.

    Gretchen is all over the board! It’s any way the wind blows with her, and currently Tamra’s ass is the one she feels the need to kiss. What a fool, and a bully, too.

  5. No one is buying Gretchen’s long winded explanation/excuses. The 3 Mean Amigos are getting BURIED in backlash just as they deserve. The more they try to justify their actions, the worse they look and they should be ashamed of themselves. If Tamra, Heather, and Wretch want to act like they’re happy about how the season is going, then they really are idiots.

  6. Gretchen has won my over. I used to not like her but for some reason I do now.

    She’s right Alexis was doing the same thing to Vicki in the past but it wasn’t bullying then.

    It’s only bullying when Alexis is not happy. She remains me of the spoiled kid who wants all the attention but only in a good way. If she doesn’t like what is going on she claims everyone is mean and leaves. I think she wanted to leave RHOC because she was not adored by all but her mother (Jim) told her to go back to the show and fight back (because they needed the paycheck more than they needed for her not to get her feelings hurt).

    1. I agree 100% Lola! The majority of the other comments on here are women bullying Gretchen, if their accepting Alexis’ definition of the word. They need to go to the store with Alexis and buy some big girl pants and grow up!

      1. You need to look up the definition of bully Anti-Snob! You remind me of another character whose comments here are mostly directed towards people who don’t agree with her, and she sounds as angry as you do. Nobody here is addressing Gretchen directly, for one thing. You, however, are addressing those who disagree with you directly with some pretty nasty comments. I am really starting to like Alexis more and more! She seems like a real sweetheart; it is fantastic to see her return to the show looking so much happier, stronger, and more confident. I think she is beautiful; her marriage looks happier. Wow! Maybe there is some jealousy?

  7. I am appalled at Gretchen’s notion that Alexis can quit her job if she doesn’t like the way her coworkers are treating her! That is a lawsuit waiting to happen; no employer would put up with co-workers treating each other the way these ladies have treated Alexis. Yes, this is a reality show, but that doesn’t mean that all gloves are off! Maybe if Gretchen was less pretty, a little nerdy, or had a speech impediment, she would know how it feels to be on the other side. Unfortunately, she has always been beautiful and popular all of her life and has no idea how it feels to be “the Alexis”.

    1. Oh please! Do you watch any of the other Real Housewives shows? ALL the women argue! And this is not real employment, it’s a show where drama is necessity. Just because Alexis is being a baby, doesn’t mean there is something wrong with EVERYONE else. Alexis has the same advantages as Gretchen…Alexis has fake boobs and got her nose done! Sometimes the truth hurts and if Alexis is unwilling to really take a look at what EVERYONE else is saying, then maybe she should go back to her dress line and TV show and not live her life in front of cameras!

      Seriously!

  8. gretchen you have dissapointed me i gotta say. you really were not a good friend to alexis. and people can see that even if they dont like alexis. and you did start it at the dinenr table aswell

  9. I have to agree about the bully part. Alexis cannot take confrontation and immediately resorts to being bullied. She obviously was never bullied as a kid or in high school.

    It’s the “word” for this year and she abuses it. She is NOT being bullied and resorts to it when she cannot answer back. Instead of standing up for herself or just walking away from the BS from Gretchen and Tamra, she cries bully and embraces sympathy that way.

    She is a coward. ALL those women have had confrontation one time or another. They have all called each other names and said mean things, but I don’t recall Alexis being told she was going to get beat up, or slander her name and post nasty things about her on the internet. Look up what the kids who are suffering being bullied and see what they have gone thru.

    Alexis–grow a backbone–stop using the bully word–and stop acting like a victim.

    1. ppl don’t decide what others get to feel if she feels bullied then that’s what matters not what we say sitting on a couch watching tidbits of the show…. I thought tamra was going to punch Alexis when she was approaching her. it’s not mature. why are so many Americans ok with iolence

  10. Give me a break! If you think Gretchen and the others are being bullies, maybe some of you should take a REALLY good look at your OWN comments!!! Do you all know these women on a PERSONAL basis? I highly doubt it! What right do you have to judge of edited ‘clips’ that see on TV? From what I have observed, Alexis is a big baby and the ladies telling her the truth from their personal point of view is NOT bullying! Alexis is a big girl and decided to be friends with these ladies…..it’s not that they force her with a gun to her head to be on the show and then get surrounded and hated on all of the time! If the ladies are “bullying” her then she was a bully to Vicki in San Fran!!! Give me a break! There is a HUGE difference between bullying and a bunch of women speaking their mind!

    And you certainly have NO RIGHT to judge her about her emotions when it comes to Greyson. You don’t know what’s in her heart and the right emotions don’t always come out on cue. I know it’s happened to me before.

    I’m with Gretchen and all of you haters can take your hate somewhere else! I would hate to see what you all have to say about people you actually know! Actions speak louder than words, especially when you take time out of your day to be so mean and rude to someone you don’t even really know!

    1. You are right, there is a big difference between being a bully and a bunch of women just speaking their minds. Here, we are speaking our minds and sharing opinions and observations. I am not speaking to any person in particular directly and I am not a bully If you disagree that’s your option, but who the hell do you think you are attacking every person here you disagree with. Your rants are obnoxious. As for your ignorant, uninformed yet hasty attack of me and my opinions, who cares what YOU think? Did you say all the “haters take your hate somewhere else”? Seriously, who do you think you are lady? You certainly look like the hater here.

  11. This last episode made me sick for so many reasons. Gretchen, you are a bully. A self-absorbed, shallow, bully. You keep saying the show is elective and bullying is not. That is pretty much like saying a child that is being bullied can transfer schools, or a sorority pledge being hazed should just not rush, so by that reasoning, are they “askin for it” if they choose to stay? That’s ricidulous.
    By the way, that was beyond disgusting to watch you bitch and moan in your selfish Gretchen-y way about how hard it’s gonna be with Slave gone :(… And you didn’t say a word about being even remotely concerned for his son?! A sick child?!! It doesn’t get any more selfish than that.
    I would not want to be on a show with any of you horrible people anyway, but get real. You all ganged up on Alexis, and it wasn’t right. And tamra is soooo trashy. You can take the girl out of the trailer park… Have a great life!

  12. Are you kidding me Gretchen,New video on OC bravo facebook page.Gretchen calls Vicki a bully on season 7,last year.BUSTED!this whole time she has been all over Lex,talk about HYPOCRITE,FAKE,LIRE,she played VICTIM for years with tamra and Vicki.Now she says Lex is playing.All the things you accuse her of,you had already done.You started the fight with Vicki,you were rude to Lydia.And worst of all clapping and yelling – when Lex was tossed out.You need to go,You and Slade your story is a bore.Hope Andy calls you out on the bullying word.You talked about the word 2 times before the party! you try and act so INNOCENT-you are the meanest of them all!

  13. I do like you Gretchen but you should have stayed out of it…..you and Heather, who by the way is getting on my nerves, she can be a real snot and nasty. Alexis should have been able to talk to Tamra without the comments. Also in my opinion, you were cold to Lydia. I was surprised by how you were because thats not how you behave from what Ive seen….anyway, just my opinion.

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