Gretchen Rossi is talking about her friendship with Tamra Barney. Gretchen is taking to her Bravo Blog to explain why Tamra confuses her. Gretchen says she wears her heart on her sleeve and easily falls for Tamra’s kind words, but says her actions can drastically change the next day.
Gretchen writes, “I have to admit, Tamra confuses me. The next day when I addressed her about why she sabotages relationships with people who get close to her and actually care about her, she broke down and gave me a glimpse into why she is the way she is. I found myself feeling sad for her and allowing the prior nights activities to just be forgotten. She has this ability, even when she does you wrong, to make you believe she didn’t mean to do it. Unfortunately, someone like me who tends to wear their heart on their sleeve is always going to fall for it because I want to believe her and believe she had not ill intent. Most call it naive, but I like to consider it always looking for the good in someone.
Our conversation on the beach was nearly two hours long. We talked about so many things and I’m sad they couldn’t show it all. Tamra said some very complimentary things about me as a person and a friend, and it made me feel good that she actually recognizes those character traits about me. However, it’s conversations like these that no matter how hurt I am I feel like I get sucked back in to thinking she cares about the friendship the same way I do. In these moments she makes me feel like we are actually very close. For example when she says “I’ve never talked to any friend but you about these things before” etc., it confuses me, because if she feels safe enough to share these very intimate details with me it leads me to believe she really trusts me and considers me a very close friend.
But just as soon as she says that to me, it can drastically change the next day. All of the sudden, she’s completely standoffish to me or is best friends with someone again after she just complained about how that person wronged her or said she doesn’t really like them. It’s a weird pattern and it’s been such a hurtful path with her. The only good thing was that after having this talk with Tamra is that at least now I know why she does it. It’s not because of something I did or didn’t do, it’s just who Tamra is and I have to learn to accept that. I care too much about people and it gets me hurt often. My parents always questioned me growing up. “How many more times are you going to get hurt before you learn?” Guess I’m still learning.”
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