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Erika Jayne Opens Up About Relationship With Her Parents

During this week’s episode of RHOBH, Erika Jayne got candid about her parents and in a new interview, she’s opening up about her non-existent relationship with her father.

“My mom and dad were married, but he left when I was about nine months old,” she shares. “He went on and lived his life, and I did not meet my dad until I was 25. He invited me up for Thanksgiving, and it was awkward for sure.”

“[I was] basically at a stranger’s house, by myself,” she added.

“There was this moment in my father’s house, and his daughter… she was a little toddler… she was playing around, and I said, ‘Well, how did you end up with a baby?’” she recalled. “And he said, ‘Well, you know, my wife, she never had any kids and I never had any kids.’ And I was like, ‘Yeah….’”

“What do you say to that?” she then asks in a confessional. “He had never, ever acknowledged my existence, to anyone, and obviously to himself, as well.”

Do you enjoy watching the more open side of Erika?

Photo Credit: Bravo

AllThingsRH

AllThingsRH

My name is Nicki. I am 32 years-old and married to my best friend. I was previously in business for over 12 years, but I’ve always had a great passion for web and graphic design. Another one of my passions, of course, is to escape into the world of TV, which is where this journey began. My goal in starting AllThingsRH.com was to give fans, like myself, a place to catch up on all the latest news and gossip about The Real Housewives. I wanted to create a place where viewers could interact with each other, share their opinions, and get straight-forward and unbiased information about what’s going on. I am proud of the diversity this site has to offer.

  • K.

    And in turn, she left her own child for some sort of fame! Never heard of her before Housewives and her very elderly husband.What a sham.

    • jane doe

      It doesnt sound like she was out of her kids life…but yes the father waa the primary parent…thats not the same thing!

  • Amanda Bates Barnette

    I can relate to a lot of the same issues Erika has dealt with in her childhood. And I’m here to say it does shape your personality. I love Erika. Don’t like or agree with everything she says and does, but I can relate.

    • kt

      I can relate as well…while it makes us stronger, we also realize there is something we missed, so we put up a hard shell to cover. I don’t always agree with everything she says or does, but I’d love to spend a week in her heels. ;0)

  • UnrealHousewife57

    While I think no one should ever abandon a child, why is it always the women who are held to a higher standard. We don’t know what kind of arrangement she had with her ex. Maybe that was the best place for the child with her life being unsettled. Fathers are, or should be, capable of raising a child. Don’t get me started on men who say they are “babysitting” while their spouse is out. Uh, it’s called parenting.

    I could never leave my kids but I won’t judge Erika for it. Her son lives with her now and they obviously have a good relationship.

    Her sperm-donor, on the other hand, disappeared for 20+ years. Saying he never had any kids is beyond devastating. I really hope she’s at peace with it. She seems to be. I glad she shut her mother down when she said she had pictures of the sperm donor when he was a child. Something twisted right there that her mom would still have these after 40 years, IMO.

    • Rain

      Awesome post and I agree with you . The tragic thing about HW is that most of the audience judges these women based on who they’re allies with or against . Erika had the misfortune of angering a lot of fans so they’ll rip her a new one before even knowing the whole story .

      Well said UHW57 xoxo

      • Evil Queen

        Agree. Love Erika! Always have. Always will.

    • This is the best comment I have seen in quite some time.

      • UnrealHousewife57

        That’s very kind of you to say. Thank you.

    • Michelle

      Beautifully said, UnrealHousewife57! I had a friend who was in a predicament for a little while where her ex had main custody (not in a legal way) while she got her life in order financially etc then the child came back to her full time and the father had visitation rights etc. It was an amicable breakup with reasonable parents who were only thinking about their child and what was best. I also know another couple who decided to stay in the same house and co-parent while still leading separate lives….but that honestly was a shit fest. Good parents will do whatever it takes to secure the child’s well being. I can’t diss Erika because I don’t know her story and I’m sure that there were circumstances that prevented her from having full custody.

      I’m with you on the “babysitting” and “thank you for helping around the house”……….okay so if we divorce, the house and all it’s contents are mine because you were only occasionally helping me out like a handy man, right? What hand man has rights to someone’s house?

    • Sugar Mama

      I agree URH57, my thought is that I don’t think she did or ever will be ok with a ghost father. That is the worst possible cut to the heart to be unrecognized by your parent no matter what a dick they are. She has a hole in part of her heart that will never mend IMO. It sickens me for her.

    • kt

      This is the best post! I have to add, I don’t think a child is abandoned when they are raised by the other responsible parent.

      • UnrealHousewife57

        A child can live with both parents and still be abandoned, but I digress. The more parenting a child receives the better.

  • Rain

    Totally understandable that it would make you guarded… our childhoods shape most of our adulthood’s . I wish you lots of happiness xoxox

    • Amanda Bates Barnette

      Thanks you! Xoxo

  • cat62

    No feelings about it one way or another…it may explain why she is the self proclaimed “ice queen”

    • Real Sandy

      She says that her own fathe is a lot younger than her husband, granted, but she did marry a man who could be seen as a father image, and she missed out on a father….
      The ice queen holds back her feelings, since she says she was raised not to show emotions that make you look weak. She learned to be tough…on the exterior, anyway.
      She has never been a favorite of mine, and I don’t understand her relationship her son. Did her ex raise him or her ex’s parents? Did she see him in his formative years very often? I don’t understand that at all from a person who missed out on one parent herself.

      • kt

        I do…sometimes when you missed out on a parent, a person feels they don’t know how to be or would never be good enough…we tend to think it would make a person stop and say, ‘I didn’t have a June Cleaver mom so I’m going to be one’ – and sometimes people do and other times they just don’t know how, being a parent isn’t always instinctive (as we want it to be). That’s just my two cents anyway…

        • Real Sandy

          I am the kind that wants to overcompensate for what I lacked growing up, when it comes to my children.
          As I said, I don’t understand her, and I did not say she did not have feelings, only that she is good at hiding them.
          One might see it as, I never had two parents so I don’t care if you do either, and I turned out okay. Maybe that is another way to view it.
          Was she just self centered and uncaring? I don’t know.

          • kt

            Or is that her way of letting people in? I believe she has a very high wall built up and she will open a door every now and then, but is very guarded.
            At the same time, she is very direct and comes off as IDC what you think…but I don’t think she has ill intent.

      • Rain

        I think as she slowly opens up , she will share this relevant information. This show has really helped her open up and slowly express her feelings xoxo

        • Real Sandy

          I just wish she would quit with the attitude. She snips at people too much.
          She is not the only one who had a sperm donor for a “father” either.
          As more and more people have their DNA on places like Ancestry, they are finding out that their “fathers” are not their biological fathers. Many “fathers” never knew the children were not theirs either…but that is changing. It is a shock to find out as an aging adult that your paternity is all wrong too.

  • HuckabeesWonkyEye

    Bla bla bla. REALLY Erika?! If I knew not having a daddy and then meeting him once in my twenties was a valid excuse for being an old trampy bitter middle aged walking identity crisis, I’d have pulled that card a long time ago. As of now, I’m blaming being a trampy bitter middle aged walking identity crisis on not getting a Barbie dream house with the working shower and a carport for her convertible. It’s working for me.

  • DaysofWineandRoses

    She has a mother who loves her and that’s what matters most. Sometimes her mom will pop in when Erika’s on Snapchat and I love their energy. Mama will always be “Mama”!

  • Cin

    Get over youself Erika Jane

  • mufffie

    Boohoo
    Never met my real dad, he never tried to reach out to me and I’m perfectly normal. Don’t have split personalities and I don’t try to be something I’m not. No crying out for attention from me!
    Had a loving mom who gave us a roof over our head and great food….

  • Barb Jean

    and she basically did the same thing except left him at 3yr. Mother of the year.

  • Minx

    Whoops! How did that Happen?
    Sorry, for Double Posts!

  • Rain

    So STUPID Stassi posted a mirror selfie that she captioned ‘Nazi Chic ‘ !! Seriously ???? WHAT THE FUXK

    • Amanda Bates Barnette

      Say what? How dumb

  • Real Sandy

    Hi Asher!
    I have not heard from you in some time. You had me worried.
    Yes, I know about all those pain medications you have been on, my friend across the pond, and I do worry about the toll it takes, and that you are so often in a stupor. I do hope you can get those painful episodes under control and still be able to function and get about without any difficulty, sweetie.
    I have been snowed in here…and just recently able to get out yesterday for the first time in days. We have had a bitter cold spell here with below freezing temperatures every day for weeks…breaking records. Then we had snow…about 18 inches…That is above my knee by a bit..and the excessive winds made much deeper snow where the snow drifts piled up…Then the shoveling out. It took several days to have it done right…and now we are do for some warmer days..though today it may snow again and maybe sleet…meaning ice on the roads.
    The piles of snow on either side of my driveway are several feet high…no fun…and I cannot walk my dog much, since his feet freeze even where we shoveled enough for him. I ordered him boots…but it figures they may arrive tomorrow..and we are due for a bit warmer weather as the week progresses.
    If you read, I have ongoing dishwasher issues…still leaking now, though not from all of the places…I actually repaired some of the problem myself over the weekend..but it is leaking underneath…and a repairman was here 3 times now..so I asked for another repairman to check out the dishwasher leak this next time…To be continued..
    I know this is not the place for personal conversation…so I won’t do it here. We can do that in emails.
    I have been watching BH and I do find Dorit and PK to be such phonies…They just seem to rehearse what they will be saying…just seems all staged to me…even the children are prompted or so it seems.
    Take care and have a great day, week, month and New Year! XOXOXO

  • Real Sandy

    I know the lies that some mothers say can devastate a child for life, and some fathers are not fathers, whether they are biological or not, and some are the best father figures without any biology involved. Some may find out that they were not as related to or related at all to relatives as they thought they were.
    I have watched a show called, “Long Lost Family” and it is about mostly adoptees who seek out their biological relatives. They tend to omit some parts of the stories, for sure, based on perhaps privacy desires, etc., and some parents don’t want to know the children, etc., but it tugs at the heartstrings. Everyone has his or her own story.
    I think that as a result of being lied to by adults as a child and by others who you looked up to, perhaps, it is very hard to trust. Finding out you are not who you thought you were and others always knew the truth, but chose not to tell you, is very hard to take, no matter what your age.
    I am okay…still dealing with the leaking dishwasher, having a major blizzard and incredibly cold weather, etc…but I am doing my best…
    My little Corey wants to go out again…but we cannot stay out long…after I layer him and myself. It is actually 30 degrees right now…after yesterday’s below 0 and single digits…so it is a little warmer for his tootsies…
    Have a great day!
    XOXO

  • Real Sandy

    Yes, strange weather here.
    No, on the dishwasher being repaired, sadly.
    I even ordered a “tub gasket” and another part to put a nice seal around the diswasher where the door pressed against it, since the “repairman” did not even do that. I did a great job…on Saturday, and now the excessive moisture on top of the door and one side are gone…however, it is still leaking underneath. I told the man the last time he came to fix the noise of the small motor he dislodged while replacing the inner door panel (how does replacing the inner door panel and vent solve the leak..but he thought that was what made it leak) that we still had a leak. He just ignored me. He did not even order the tub gasket (a rubber piece that is easily removed and replaced)…but the drip seems to be coming from the area around the pump..under the diswasher…not the door as he thought…though it was probably from both at one point…two leaks…
    Now, I asked for another tech to come out, a “senior technician” and he or she is due to arrive on Friday, the day of the deluge…I believe we are getting lots of rain either Friday or Saturday or both…have to check the weather.
    The snow started to melt yesterday, the first day in over 2 weeks of subfreezing temps and no temp above freezing…and last night ice formed…We still have large piles of snow..and it is not so warm today but will be above freezing at some point.
    I ordered boots for my little dog…and they took forever to arrive, and though I measured, they arrived today…too small. I wonder if he would even wear them, but they are going back.
    Such is life. I called the exterminator and left a message…Mice back in the attic above my son’s room again. I need to find someone to check the roof out…at some point to see where they are getting in…makes me ill, really.
    Everyone now sees all that I have written.
    I believe everyone should know basic facts about their true heritage by the time they are 18 years old. If their biological parent was raped, it should be written, no matter how hard it is to bear. They should have the option of contact either by phone or in person, even if for one time only. They should always be given medical history of their ancestors as much as possible…at their birth. We are talking 18 years old…and it is still young, and yes, it is heartwrenching to find out that you were the product of a rape by a stranger, if that is what happened. It is the worst. It does provide some sort of closure, however.
    I understand how an adoptive parent would have a hard time telling a child that they raised from birth that they were adopted, and they should not have to tell them so young, in my opinion. The child would be more confused and upset, most likely.
    I think with Ancestry and the other DNA sites, more and more are finding out who they really are genetically and it is a shocker for more than a few to see who they really are.
    Take care.