Carole Radziwill On RHONY Reunion: “There’s No Crying In Baseball, & There Are No Backs In Reality TV!”

After The Real Housewives of New York Reunion Part 1, Carole Radziwill is taking to her Bravo Blog to clear some things up. She discusses the difference of talking behind someone’s back and being on a reality television show, the whole story of LuAnn asking to borrow a dress from her friend, and how sometimes The Housewives themselves don’t know what’s going on until they watch the show.

Carole writes,

“Princesses and people are the same to me. No distinction. I didn’t talk behind LuAnn’s — or anyone’s — back. In fact, I barely talked to LuAnn in front of her back. One of the few times I did, it was to discuss my feelings about a situation that involved her and a close friend of mine and we walked away from that conversation just fine. She never brought it up again. She didn’t tell me that her feelings were hurt. How painful it must have been to hold that in for the entire four months of filming? In fact, I had no idea that LuAnn felt it was “the most hurtful thing anyone had said” to her until right there on the couch. Do you know why? Because she never said this, ever, in front of me.

It’s so silly all this talk about backs. Everyone is so caught up in backs that no one can see the fronts. What we say in interviews and our blogs is not behind anyone or anything, it’s public. It’s for the whole world to watch or read if they care to. There’s no crying in baseball, and there are no backs in reality TV. It is why it’s such a fun guilty pleasure.

What makes the show more than just watching us lunch and cab around town to parties, are the observations. We watch it, we live it, we share our observations. We are meant to point out the odd, humorous, and curious behaviors of each other in confessional interviews. So we do. When Sonja said, in an interview, she thinks I’m a poor hostess this isn’t talking behind my back. She’s being asked to comment on a situation, she’s being asked her observations.

Is elegance learned or does it come naturally? Who knows. I think LuAnn is purposely dodging the real issue about my friends and the dress so she can make this a conversation that is focused on her.

I don’t ask designers for dresses. It’s an imposition on a designer, so I don’t ask, because I’m not Meryl Streep — a designer wouldn’t get much attention for going to the trouble. But borrowing happens. I get it. I like to share. I lend my girlfriends clothes and I borrow my girlfriend’s dresses from time to time. In fact, I’m wearing my best friend’s dress on the reunion, I love it! I’m not giving it back.

Here’s the story: I had only met LuAnn twice, I barely knew her when she asked if I could arrange for her to get earrings from Ranjana’s showroom. She got the earrings, enjoyed my friend’s hospitality, then asked to borrow dresses. Naeem did not offer as she says. Naeem is not my “designer friend” he is a friend. He’s one of my closest friends, like family, and I would never want him to be put in an awkward position with a favor request from a stranger because of me. Just as I would no more walk into Jacques office and ask him to send me ten cases of wine — gratis. This — to me — is about politeness. It was never about earrings or designers, or even LuAnn; it was always about code of conduct. My code and LuAnn’s code are different. I’m not saying one is better, but they are obviously different. And they clashed from time to time, as you saw.

“There are known knowns, known unknowns and there are unknown unknowns.” Donald Rumsfeld said that, it’s non-sensically brilliant. I think he may have been a Housewife in another country, another life.

We aren’t aware of all the scenes that are being filmed while we’re shooting, so there are a lot of unknown unknowns. During the season, each of us only knows the scenes we are in, we don’t see the big picture.

So if I’m not in a scene — like on St. Barth’s, when Aviva insulted Ramona and Sonja — I don’t know how it exactly went down or what was said until I watch the show. I’m watching it cold, just like you. We didn’t get a script of the scenes that were shot or dialogue that was said. It’s reality, and in real life friends meet with each other, have lunch, talk, argue, plan parties, and vacations and not everyone knows what is said to whom, just as in real life we find things out second or third-hand. The filming of the show and the watching of it are two completely different experiences.”

Tell Us- Do you agree with Carole?

Photo Credit: Bravo

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My name is Nicki. I am 32 years-old and married to my best friend. I was previously in business for over 12 years, but I’ve always had a great passion for web and graphic design. Another one of my passions, of course, is to escape into the world of TV, which is where this journey began. My goal in starting AllThingsRH.com was to give fans, like myself, a place to catch up on all the latest news and gossip about The Real Housewives. I wanted to create a place where viewers could interact with each other, share their opinions, and get straight-forward and unbiased information about what’s going on. I am proud of the diversity this site has to offer.

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